Swapping snacks turned into eliminating snacks, meals got smaller and smaller, any diet that allowed 'treats' was out of the question; I thrived on restriction. I found something so intoxicating about that routine, that mixture of gnawing hunger and waning hope as the day goes on. The torturous workouts and the denied cravings that earn so much praise -
"You're so dedicated! I wish I could make myself go to the gym, how'd you do it?!"
"Look at you! So skinny! How did you do that?"
"You have so much will power, how can you turn down chocolate cake?!"
The answer that I never said -